A Visit to Julia's Family

Warning: another long post! And I didn't take the time to bold the main points this time. So if you're in a rush, you can just look at the pictures. :-)

My journey with Julia continues to be testament of God's divine orchestrating. There are so many things laced with His unique fingerprints, showing me that He is in the details of every part of this. 


Kenya. Think of the whole country of Kenya. Take a wild guess where Julia's family's home is.......

The family's home is at the top of the ridge, overlooking the valley

About 10 minutes from Haven on the Hill!! Yep, where my boys are, where I spent so much time 1-2 years ago. How would it be that she happened to come from a place that I know, even as rural as it is?? God. Yes, God is just that cool!

(This is Julia with her cousin, of the same name, Wambui, who were born at the same hospital within an hour of each other.)

Julia was born in the same hospital where we used to take the Haven boys, the same hospital where John died. Her family walks the same roads that Naomi and the boys walk. And a further "coincidence" is that Julia is actually related (by marriage of extended family members) to Naomi, the boys' auntie! 


So, while we were visiting at Haven, we went to visit her family as well.  What an experience. Julia is my baby. I am her mother. I have no doubt about that, and neither does she. I cannot explain or describe the feeling of sitting with Julia and her biological mother. Walking into their family home and meeting all of her family. 

(This was after we had been there awhile and Julia had warmed up enough to leave my lap and go out to meet the kids.)

In Kenyan tradition, a family's home is very distinct. Though some may leave the family home and go live in the city, "home" is always "home." All the sons will build a home in their father's home (or on their land, rather). So when you go to one's home, you are automatically with extended family and among several generations.

We were in the home of Julia's uncle, her grandmother's brother. The eldest living male of the family. The patriarch of the family. The one who cares for Julia's grandmother and mother.


As we came to the home, we were escorted to a house. A typical rural Kenyan house. As is custom, guests are invited into the "nicest" house of the family. This one happened to belong to one of Julia's uncle's sons. It was definitely the nicest house in the home. As all the other houses were mud walled, this one was made of mabati (tin) walls and roof. Dirt floor. One large room, no separate bedrooms. Outdoor choo (outhouse). Outdoor kitchen. 

We were escorted in by Julia's uncle and his son, whom we had met before. Then came the uncle's wife and a few daughters-in-law. They brought tea and served us. Then, came Julia's mother and grandmother. It was obvious that her mother had no idea that Julia was her child. 

Julia's mother is mentally retarded, as is her grandmother. The family tried to involve Julia's mother and have her sit with us and talk. She spilled her tea twice within the 10 minutes she was there. Julia would not go to her on her own, so I went and sat beside her, with Julia in my lap.

Julia had her book, Brown Bear, Brown Bear in her hands. Her mother tried to take the book but Julia did not want her to. She had just shared the book with the other children, but did not react the same to this grown woman. Her mother tried to look and pull it out of her hands. Julia pulled back. It was the strangest feeling ever. I am holding my one year old baby as she "argues" with her biological mother. 

(Notice Julia's birth mother who is fascinated by my hand, just like most Kenyan children are when they first see a white person.)

My thoughts went back to my preschool special ed days and I figured that her mother is at about a 3-4 year old child level. They were literally arguing with each other in a very child-like way. It was clearly obvious to me that there is NO way her mother could care for her. I completely understand all that the uncle had told me about the mother prior to this meeting. Julia also has a 15 year old brother who is also mentally retarded and in a school for children with special needs.

I had a letter of acknowledgement/consent that I wanted the family to sign. Since we have moved to Nakuru, we must begin the guardianship process over again, going through the Nakuru courts and Childrens Department. I want to be able to take this letter of their consent with me as I meet with the lawyer. I truly respect Julia's uncle as he wanted the whole family to be involved in the decision. He wants there to be no misunderstanding of the situation.


I also appreciated the fact that it was to be a "family decision" for them. I want to be able to tell Julia that though she had a mother who was unable to care for her, her family loved her enough to allow her to come to a new mommy, to a new family, who can take care of her.

Julia's father is unknown. Her mother was taken advantage of, as was her grandmother. Yes, my Julia is a second generation product of rape. I truly believe this little girl has a special anointing on her life. I do not know God's whole plan for her life, but I know He has brought her into my life for a reason. I pray that it is forever, but I do not know all that the future holds. I know that she is with me for this season, and I am honored to be her mommy. I have been given the gift of providing her with a home that is safe and full of love. A home where she is offered the hope of a future she could not have with her biological family. 


And even more than that, I am convinced that God has placed a covering of protection over Julia. What a testimony of redemption her life is, and will continue to be! A true picture of God's love and grace. Her earthly heritage is overshadowed by her heavenly heritage in a powerful way! I just cannot wait to see how God uses her little life to tell a story of His faithfulness and provision! 


So now, as you think of Julia, I hope you will pray for our situation. Pray that the Lord will go before us and prepare our way in the courts; that His will be done, in His time.